Do you think it's a real barrel of laughs when kids act up at school, but you're too old to go to school yourself? Well, there's a place for you! It's called the public library.
The libe is a whole new vista of opportunity for Myoflex-slathered geezers like me who yearn for our youth. Whatever your age or station in life, you can misbehave at the library and witness the hilarious outcome of others' hijinks.
After the Opening Day parade recently, I dropped by the Cincinnati Public Library to use the tinkletorium. This visit to the johndola reaped an uproarious payout. I discovered somebody had completely covered the toilet seat with toilet paper and peed on it - leaving urine-soaked toilet paper clinging to the seat.
This gambit has a long, honorable history but never gets old. Perhaps my earliest memory of it was 28 years ago when I was in 5th grade. As at the libe recently, somebody covered the toilet seat in the boys' restroom with bathroom tissue and allowed pee to coat it. The teacher threatened to press her "board of education" into service if the allegation proved to be true - which it was, but no suspects could be indicted.
Just a few days ago, I again used the johnnypot at the Cincinnati Public Library. This time, I noticed somebody had placed toilet paper on the floor and urinated on it.
O, to be an adult again!